How bad is this magazine really?

A few months ago we received a notice that our frequent flier miles were about to expire. Obviously we haven't been traveling frequently enough because the only thing we could afford to get with them was a couple of magazine subscriptions. We picked Smithsonian and Self. Smithsonian has turned out to be a interesting magazine, Self - not so much. Poor Craig has to listen to me rant and rave for 30 minute each month over how wrong they are about what is and is not healthy (Example: I can't believe they picked Sour Patch as the Healthy Food Awards top candy. It's pure sugar, couldn't they have at least picked something with nuts or chocolate for protein/antioxidants?!). Then I get so frustrated I toss it in the recycling bin mostly unread. This month was no exception.

The worst article was titled "How bad is it really?" and seeks to classify one's secret indulgences into "not so bad", "kinda bad" and "really bad" confessions. "For dinner last night, I had an Oreo, then another and another." was categorized as not so bad, as long as it is a rare event. I guess I can see that, I have been known on a really hormonal day to forgo dinner in exchange for brownies and ice cream and will not judge a fellow female for doing the same. But the next one, "I had a one night stand." was only kinda bad because, "the occasional fling can be fun - and hot!" while "I tan, but only on vacation" and "I'm not a regular smoker, but I do sometimes bum a butt on a night out." were categorized as really bad. I'm not going to say that tanning and smoking are healthy, but in what universe is tanning a couple days out of a year less healthy than having sex with a random stranger?!

The next time I get the urge to rebel and break a healthy habit, I don't think I'll be turning to Self for help picking which one is worth the splurge. They can take their Sour Patch candy and hook-ups, I'll keep my peanut M&Ms.

Foreign Affairs Friday: Australia and China

Australia and China have had an up-and-down relationship lately. Here are some recent happenings:

• An Australian mining company pulled out of a big iron ore deal with a Chinese (state owned) company. Shortly thereafter, some Chinese-born employees of the Aussie company were arrested in China for supposedly spying.
  

• Another Chinese company (tied to the state) signed a big deal to buy lots of natural gas from Australia.

• Much to China's chagrin, Australia allowed a leader of China's Uighur minority (which participated in recent riots) to visit the country.

China is important to Australia because it is a big purchaser of Australian natural resources (mainly metals). China is Australia's second-largest export market (behind Japan), so it is crucial to Australia's economic growth. At the same time, China is becoming more powerful, and could come to dominate the Asia-Pacific region and become a threat to Australia. Because of uncertainty about how friendly China will be in the future, Australia, like other countries, is wary of China's strategy of buying up resources at the source, rather than purchasing them via the marketplace. Similar concern was raised in the US in 2005 when a Chinese firm tried to buy Unocal, a US oil company. The fact that the Chinese government owns or directs its major companies fuels suspicion that these deals are about more than just meeting resource needs, and instead serve to give China leverage over other countries.

In managing China's rise, Australia will have to consider US actions. It wouldn't want to see a cold-war situation between the US and China, because that would force Australia to take sides. Australia would take the US side if necessary, but this might hurt it economically. Australia will also have to consider how much to cooperate with the US in places like Afghanistan. The operation there gives the Aussie military a chance to learn, gain experience, and earn favor with the US, but it could also use up resources that would instead go to homeland defense. Australia's recent defense white paper stresses that Australia wants to be able to fend for itself in case of an attack.

As we can see from this, the US isn't the only nation that has to recalculate its interests due to happenings in China. We also see that, while we share the same broad interests as our Western allies, each of these allies has its own unique interests to consider.

Literary Feast

I mentioned earlier that I've been on a bit of a reading binge lately and it's true. I just can't seem to get books into my hands fast enough right now. Most of the books I pick up because they have been recommended by friends, other bloggers, my mom, etc. I have much more confidence in someone I know to recommend something good than a review or a spot on a bestseller list. Since I enjoy reviews so much, I thought I would pass along my thoughts on my most recent reads.

I'm sure I'm not the first person to do this (or maybe I am and I'm just a little more odd than I thought) but I tend to classify the books I read according to the type of brain "meal" they would be, so that is what I am going to do.

Dinners: "Healthy" books; most non-fiction falls into this category, as do classic literature or even those books that I think are well-written and force me to pause and think.

Who Made the Moon: a father explores how science and faith agree. Sigmund Brouwer - I was expecting a steak dinner but this turned out to be more like a happy meal, completely devoid of any nutrition and tastes like cardboard going down. The author was illogical and couldn't seem to figure out who his audience was. When he did decide, his point was still, "I think I'm right but it's true I may not be, but I'm less likely to send your children to hell so you should think my way." I'm just proud of myself for finishing it.

The end of education: redefining the value of school. Neill Postman - Well written, his argument made sense and even when I didn't agree with his all of his conclusions, I still gained something from reading it as it definitely got me thinking... mostly how I don't ever want my children to go to school, but that wasn't his intention. I liked it so much that I picked up another of his books...

Amusing ourselves to death. Neill Postman - Good and probable more relevant today than when it was written. Sadly, I think it might be too late for me. At the end of the 3rd chapter, I put it down to check my Facebook account. (I did pick it up again later, though).

Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the rise of raunch. Ariel Levy - This is the only one of the listed books that I hadn't read in the last few weeks but I meant to talk about it several months ago when I finished it but didn't ever get around to it. I still remember it well which is already a plus in its favor. It's not a long book, but it took me a while to get through because I could only read a chapter at a time because it was a little depressing. From 13-year-olds with "bootylicious" written on the back of their pants to 21-year-olds who will expose their body to millions of men in pursuit of a trucker hat, women in the country don't seem to have a good grasp of what it means to be empowered. But the extreme examples, while shocking, only illustrate a deeper problem. Levy is written from a completely different worldview than me and her thoughts on why this is happening (I can't for the live of me figure out how she blames 14-year-olds having sex on the fact that "Bush hates gays") and what to do about it don't really match up with mine, but it's good information and I think it does a great job illustrating how the feminist movement has let us down, even though that isn't necessarily the goal of the book.

Snacks: Most non-fiction goes here provided it is at least fairly well written. You wouldn't want to completely survive off of snacks but they can provide some intellectual nutritional value as well as fun during the course of a day.

Julia Grey Series (Silent in the grave, Silent in the sanctuary and Silent on the moor). Deanne Raybourn. Despite what the covers may imply, this is a series of three victorian mysteries with a bit of romance and not harlequin romance novels. It took me a while to get into the first one bu I did eventually and by the end of the first, which was a bit more scandalous than I anticipated, I was hooked and read all three in a row. The plots may not always be plausible and the endings wrap things up just a little too nicely but the characters suck you in. Plus, the author has a blog and I love it when authors are real people who like to interact with their readers, especially when they treat their characters like real people. It makes me feel less weird about doing so myself. I'm already excited about her other books coming out in the next year or two. (Rachel, I have a feeling you would enjoy these.)

Diary of a Provincial Lady. E.M. Cummings - Funny but odd. I'm not sure why but it reminds me a bit of an Amelia Bedelia book, except for grown-ups. Full of dry British humor (which I happen to love), it is like reading a blog written in 1931. And while our lives may be different in many many ways, in terms of "diaries"it is still more relatable than Bridget Jones'.

The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency. Alexander McCall Smith. The people that like this series seem to really like it. I picked it up a few years ago but didn't really get it and eventually the library reclaimed it. I tried again and this time I thought it was okay. I'll probably read more and keep trying to enjoy them as much as others seem too.

Book Candy - Absolutely no nutritional value but a treat nonetheless and won't kill your brain as long as you eat real food too.

Twilight Series. Stephenie Meyer. - Oh yes I did. I started and finished this whole silly 2000+ page series in under 48 hrs. I won't say it is well written, it's not. I won't say it illustrates true love and Edward is the ideal boyfriend/husband, it doesn't and he isn't. But it's so fun that Stephanie Meyer completely succeeded at sucking me into her strange world of vampires and werewolves. And really, who doesn't want to read about a clumsy 17-year-old soon to be pro-life girl and her perfect 100+ year-old, abstinence-promoting, "vegetarian" vampire boyfriend as they struggle with real issues such as the value of life, souls, vampire ethics, physical displays of affection, and loving someone enough to let them go. Okay really, I wouldn't let my 13-year-old read this and there are valid complaints that it paints an unrealistic portrait of love to the point where adolescent girls may not understand the difference between a healthy, protective relationship and an abusive one but by the end, I think both Bella and Edward have really demonstrated all four types of love, although they obviously aren't perfect. Plus, it just makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside (but no, that doesn't mean I'm team Jacob). Don't worry Craig, I still love you, even if you can't dazzle me with your perfect angular facial features, messy but model-like hair, and cold but rock hard body that sparkles in the sunlight.

Goodbye little fishy

Goodbye my little fishy. You were a nice fish. I picked you out of all the others at that wedding because you were the prettiest which is shallow, I agree, but in the end you had a nice personality too, for a fish. You liked your castle. You liked to eat. That is why we named you hungry Howie. You only lasted a year but I hope it was a nice year. That is quite a bit longer than we thought you would considering Zeeba liked to watch you swim, a lot. Eventually she gave up trying to catch you and just enjoyed your entertaining spirit. We all did. I promise I will get around to flushing you tonight, I just didn't have the time peace of mind to do so last night. Goodbye my little fishy.

I will praise You in this storm

Hello, hello, I feel like I haven't written in forever. I've written stuff, but not really about me. These past few weeks I've just been being. Not doing anything crazy, no travels or fun plans, just being. I was actually dreaded these weeks because I had nothing much going on and I was anxiously waiting for some things this upcoming week to happen so of course I knew the time would just drag on. Silly me, God had plans for these weeks.

I've been on a bit of reading kick and have spent most nights reading, not even turning on the tv or internet and only keeping up with emails/blog stuff during my lunch breaks. It's been great, except when Craig calls and I realize it is almost 9 and I still haven't eaten dinner. Not very healthy for my body, but it allowed my mind to be calm and quite and willing to listen.

I've also had some great fellowship time lately. I was in a women's bible study/book club over the summer and we finished up last week. Even though I know I'll see the girls every week at church and homegroup, it makes me sad that it is over because it was such a great time every week to talk and encourage one another. After we said goodbye, I just sat and thought about how great my God is that he always knows the friends you will need and puts them in your life at just the right times. We all have our own personalities and problems we are struggling with, but when we come together, we have the same spirit in us and God's truth's always seem to pour out. It's amazing.

Thursday night due to retreats, graduations and new babies coming into the world, our home group was small, just five of us. So nobody bothered to put together any "real plans" except to gather and worship. Well, nobody except God. We ate cookies (cookie make everything better, don't you think?) sang some worships songs and old hymns and talked about the scriptures we had been reading lately which turned into some odd theological discussion but it was just perfect. It felt like how I imagine the original church would have been like, except with air conditioning. Because I knew everyone there, I knew when we sang those songs that we all needed the truth in those lines and it was a powerful sense of community but at the same time, I knew that those words were also for meant just for me, as one person in a relationship with the one true God and it was very private. I can't explain it any more than to say - if you don't have a small group of Christians you regular spend time with that you worship with and pray with and know you can depend on, find some! Pray for them, search a community group out in your church, start a group yourself, do what it takes. God uses those people in my life all the time.

It struck me when I was leaving that time that the things I had shared things that week were the same things I had been telling myself for a few months now. But sometimes you sing songs or quote scripture or even just mediate on statements with yourself and you know it but you don't really feel it or believe it. But this time, when I was sharing it, I had faith, I knew it was true. And to be honest, I wasn't sure if I would ever get to that point.

For several reasons that I won't get into here, these past few months have been tough on me and there were weeks when I knew I was just going through the motions of living life. And I didn't want to live like that and I was angry, I just wanted everything to go back to the way it was and be peaceful (not that everything was perfect 6 months ago, it never is, but of course I had forgotten all but the best parts :-) Then I relented, obviously God was trying to teach me something so I tried to be good and just let him so we could get this whole potter shapping clay thing over with. But I didn't like it, it was uncomfortable, even painful, and I didn't feel like myself and I just wanted to get it over with. And I told Him that, that was all I had at the moment, obedience. You want me here God, I'll be here, but that is all I can do. I can't praise you here, I can't see the good here, but I'm here.

And slowly it has been getting better. This week I said things like "I know He has a purpose" and "I wouldn't give my trials back if I had to give back what He has taught me" and it struck me that I believed that now It wasn't just words. He has been drawing me to him and shaping me and I didn't even realize it until this past week, but parts of me that were broken so badly that I didn't think they could be mended, are now being mended. Not back to the way they were, God is still working on me and it will probably be a two steps forward, one step back process but it's happening and it will continue. And they will always be a scar there, the circumstances and relationships of that hurt are now a part of who I am and that will always be the case, but I wouldn't want it any other way. I feel like me again, but a better me, a me that looks more like Him.

The circumstances were not good. But God is. And now I can praise him for that time, for those struggles, for what I lost because before He took it away, He gave it to me, even for just a little while, it was gift from Him, just as the trials were. And the funny thing is, my circumstances haven't changed, I'm still waiting on Him, hoping in His promises for the future, but I do have His peace now and that makes all the difference. It really does surpasses all understanding.

This post may not make sense to you and that's fine, I wrote it more for me than to be read but I still want to post it because if you feel like I did before, like you're barely holding on and it isn't getting any better, like the storm just keeps coming and doesn't show signs of stopping, hold on. The rainbow is coming. He promises. And someday, even if it isn't today because today you are still just working at being present, before you can even think about praising, someday you will be able to sing this, as I am right now.


Here are the lyrics if you don't want to watch.

Praise You In This Storm
I was sure by now
That You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth