One of the main Montessori principles is to respect the child’s absorbent mind. For infants, this includes talking to them. Not just talking to them, but talking with them and having conversations, even though they can’t actually respond to their half*. Another part of it is explaining to them what you are going to do before you do it.
I always thought this would be natural and for the most part, it is. I made it a point to talk to Lucy most of the day when she was little(r). In fact, over the holidays my brother asked me why I was kept talking about what I was doing. At the time, Lucy wasn’t even with me! It guess it was just a habit.
But as she has gotten older, I realize I’m not as diligent about it, especially when I get busy. And sometimes I just don’t think to explain to her what is going on.
Case in point: Last week her nose was running like crazy and she decided she did not like my doing anything about it. So I spent 3-4 days chasing her around with a diaper trying to wipe it off before it annoyed her and she did it herself, a true disaster resulting in snot covering every square inch of her face. It was not pleasant.
But then on Craig’s day off, he started saying “wipe, wipe” before he wiped her nose and by that afternoon, as soon as he said “wipe,” she would stop what she was doing, lean her face towards you and wait for you to wipe her nose. I guess it wasn’t that she didn’t like her nose wiped but that she didn’t like her face suddenly and unexpectedly being attacked. Oops!
So the moral of the story: don’t underestimate the baby. Or the husband.
*This idea is by no means exclusive to Montessori. Almost any child development book will say to talk to your child! Some Montessori followers say this includes not using a artificially high and exaggerated voice (parentese) but I disagree. We never did “baby talk” but almost all people instinctively do parentese around babies, Craig and I included, and I think that their is a reason and current studies show it does help babies learn language.
I like that Zuzu gives me an excuse to narrate my trips to the grocery store. I'm much less likely to forget what I'm doing if I say it aloud!
ReplyDeleteJason taught Zuzu to blow her nose months ago. I didn't think she could/would do it, but he kept showing her and now she's got it down. You're right about not underestimating the husband!
I recently read that scientist hypothesize that infants can hear higher pitches earlier than lower pitches which may be the reason that people speak in higher pitches to babies :)
ReplyDeleteIt's so fun reading about your parenting adventures - especially with your lovingly analytical approach to parenting!
This makes me think of the gilmore girls where sookie has her first baby, and the midwife speaks to little davey like he's an adult. "in 5 minutes we'll feed"
ReplyDeleteha - Oh how I yearn for the day when Lucy can blow her own nose.
ReplyDeletekatie - haha, yes. To say that I have a analytical approach to parenting is the understatement of the year. I overanalyze everything in life so I shouldn't be surprised I do that with parenting too :-)
amanda - I miss gilmore girls :-(
like! I def need to get better at telling Ezra what I'm doing.
ReplyDelete